12 Tips for the Convert Muslim


By Brother Alex (Dallas, TX)

1. Practice Islam as much as you can

“He who loves my Sunnah has loved me, and he who loves me will be with me in Paradise.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Tirmidhi)

As a new Muslim, you will have trouble keeping up with prayers every day, fasting during Ramadan, and the many other practices in this religion. The struggle that we face, with such a radical change in lifestyle, is difficult and will take some time. Awkward moments are bound to happen, don’t fret. You are not expected to wake up at 4am every morning to pray tahajjud (extra night prayers). If you have problems with certain practices, then gradually work yourself into the mindset of worship. A counselor once told me when I was young, “How do you eat an elephant? Just One bite at a time.” Think of it as one step at a time. Pray to Allah (swt) and ask for Him to make it easy for you and the rest will come naturally.

Keeping up with your devotional practices is something that will strengthen your faith immensely. Read the Qur’an whenever possible. Find a collection of hadith, such as Riyadh us-Saliheen, and read it often. You will start to feel a connection to Allah (swt) and you will become used to Islam as a religion and way of life.

2.  Respect your parents

“Heaven lies under the feet of your mother.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Ahmad, Nasa’i)

Keeping up a good relationship with your family is essential. Try to avoid bringing up or taking part in controversial subjects regarding religion. This is almost unavoidable, but your parents will eventually accept that Islam is not going to turn you into a terrorist if you stay calm during these tense moments. Gradually, your parents will gain some respect and understanding of Islam and may start to become genuinely interested. This is a great sign and insha’Allah, God will make a way for them to accept Islam.

What you do not want to do is act like you know everything, attempt to debate everything, or overly defend yourself in a way that might make you angry or upset. This will just cause heartache and uneasiness. Your priority now should be to work on yourself.

3. Find a teacher

“For him who follows a path for seeking knowledge, Allah will ease for him the path to Paradise.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Muslim)

Finding a teacher to bounce ideas off of is a great way to learn your deen (religion). I found it is good to find someone with as much knowledge as possible who also has an understanding of the English language and American culture. It is difficult to listen to someone with a thick accent or someone with a back-home mentality. When I first accepted Islam, I would drive every day to visit my teacher and I would ask him what seemed like an endless stream of questions. Sometimes he seemed overwhelmed! This is a great way to clarify things you hear on Sheikh Youtube or Google or any part of the Qur’an you are reading at the time.

This will also help you have a real grounding in the Islamic tradition. You will eventually have spent more time learning Islam than most people from Muslim families. Maintain a sense of humility if you do gain a lot of knowledge, as there will always be someone who will be more knowledgeable than you. Learn everything you can in small chunks, no one is asking you to be a scholar!

4. Keep away from debates and arguments

“Verily anger spoils faith as aloe spoils honey.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi)

Trying to constantly defend your religion is something that will cause you a lot of stress. I remember when I first accepted Islam, it seemed like the whole world was after me. This may happen to different people at different levels, but it was a very overwhelming experience for me. The best thing to do is avoid these arguments at all costs. If you are mature about your religion and display a desire to explain yourself without refuting others, then many doors will open for you. You are bound to give someone a refreshing view of Islam, which is what so many people are hungry for after seeing Islam in such a negative light in the media.

Staying away from these discussions will put you at peace and give you breathing room. A lot of converts are not really comfortable with bringing up their religion because of the backlash they receive. Personally, I recognized that if I just mention it when necessary, I get a more positive reaction. You’ll be surprised to hear “Oh that’s cool dude, what made you pick that religion?” This is always an opportunity for da’wah (inviting to Islam).

5. Gain a connection to the Arabic language

“Indeed, We have sent it down as an Arabic Qur’an that you might understand.”
-The Holy Qur’an, 12:2

This is one of my favorite parts of becoming a Muslim. To be honest, I’m a language-lover and I realize everyone is not the same in this regard. Just because you failed high school Spanish though doesn’t mean you will have trouble with Arabic. There are many tricks to learning the language that I won’t go into here, but there are ways to make this easier on yourself. These methods can be found online or in books; with a little research you can pave your way to gaining an understanding of Arabic.

Start by learning the alphabet and connecting letters together. You can learn this in an afternoon if you know someone that is a native Arabic speaker (but go at your own pace). Sit on that for a while and eventually you will be able to follow along in the Qur’an if you listen to a recitation on your computer or MP3 player. You will start to recognize words, after which you can get into simple grammar rules. I recommend learning common nouns and prepositions first (words like “in”, “on”, “for” and “with”).

Arabic can be really enjoyable, and you are bound to gain an Islamic vocabulary after listening to talks or lectures. Eventually you will know meanings of words like “furqaan” and “sajdah” and you’ll be able to use them in conversations with Muslims. Sabr (patience) is essential!

6. Understand Islam’s organic nature

“Those who make things hard for themselves will be destroyed. (He said it three times.)”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Muslim)

Coming to Islam will sometimes put you in a situation where you are overwhelmed with opinions that are hard to follow. As an example, one might be told that you have to wash your feet every time you make wudhu (ablution) unless you wipe over leather socks that have been worn from your previous wudhu. For most Americans, the idea of wearing leather socks is something that we find extremely unusual. If we do a little research, we find there are opinions of scholars that mention the permissibility of wiping over cotton socks (even ones with holes in them!). To an American convert, these opinions can cause a huge sigh of relief.

7. Maintain your Identity

“O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted.”
-The Holy Qur’an, 49:1

Being a Muslim is a huge part of your identity now. That doesn’t mean you can’t barbeque with your friends or watch football on Sundays. If there are things in your culture that do not directly contradict with basic Islamic creed, then you are welcome to keep those things in your life. You do not need to start wearing Arab or Indian clothing. As long as your clothes cover what they are supposed to cover, you are in the clear.

Many converts are also exposed to really weird food that is overly spicy or funny tasting. This might lead us to think that eating curry is sunnah or something righteous. We can still have our own culture and tastes in food: pot roast and beans are still halal!

There are many other examples of things that you will be exposed to that are from foreign cultures and do not necessarily have anything to do with Islam. Our goal as new Muslims is to worship Allah (swt), not to add a Pakistani or Arab identity to our persona.

It is good to have a teacher who understands the subtleties of different opinion in fiqh (Islamic jurisprudence) and can inform you of differences among the scholars on issues that are of concern. Most people in masajid will have a very limited view of the juristic possibilities inside the Islamic tradition. Islam is a vast tradition and we should not make it small. These diverse opinions are there to help us, not cause strain on ourselves.

8. Force yourself to go to the masjid

“The person who receives the greatest reward for the Salah is one who lives the farthest and has the farthest to walk.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Bukhari, Muslim)

Going on Fridays is a given, but I would also recommend trying to fit a few prayers (at least) per week in the masjid. This will open many doors for you and will insha’Allah grant many good deeds to your account. You will meet people who are connected to Islam; networking opportunities are more readily available; and you are bound to make long-lasting friends. This is one of the things that I really love about Islam, that you can almost always find people in the masjid.

Although this may be hard initially, try and go to the masjid. The payoff will be huge, even if you just pray and leave right after. You will eventually warm up to the community and you can feel more comfortable going to the masjid whenever you like.

9. Find Muslim friends and avoid severing ties

“On the Day of Resurrection Allah Almighty will proclaim: “Where are those who have mutual love for My Glory’s sake? Today I shall shelter them in My shade where there is no shade but Mine.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Muslim)

Saying “As-salamu ‘Alaykum” ( “Peace be upon you”)  to people you see on campus or at the grocery store is a real blessing in Islam. It immediately lets people know you are Muslim and they usually will be happy to return the greeting and hopefully share a few words with you. Doors of friendship will be opened and you will meet lots of people. Try and spend some time with Muslims when you can. It is beneficial to remind yourself that you are not the only Muslim on the planet and you share your religion with almost 2 billion people around the globe.

Also, don’t sever your friendships with your non-Muslim friends unless they are constantly partying or using the list of major sins as their weekend to-do list. You can be a light to your Christian, Agnostic, Jewish, or Atheist friends. You never know who Allah (swt) will guide, and showing that you are living an ethical life can encourage these people to learn a little about Islam or change their mind to having a positive view of the religion.

10. Avoid Loneliness

“Islam began as something strange and will revert to being strange as it began, so give glad tidings to the strangers.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (Muslim)

This is a major problem in the convert community. We are lonely. The best thing we can do to fight the feeling of loneliness is to spend as much time as possible with good company. Having dinners with people a few nights a week is a sure way to maintain a good attitude. The practice of becoming a nun or a monk is alien to Islam; we are social creatures and Islam recognizes this.

Try not to lock yourself away in your apartment to avoid the world. This will just cause a vicious cycle that will cause deep depression and can lead to searching for solace in haram (unlawful).

Make it an obligation on yourself to remain a sociable human being. It takes a lot of work but the result is happiness and contentment in life.

11. Stay away from extremism

“And thus we have made you a just community that you will be witnesses over the people.”
-The Holy Qur’an, 2:143

Most converts do not enter Islam looking for an extremist point of view. Unfortunately, we have seen some converts do end up overseas working for terrorist organizations. This is something that can happen from a person feeling victimized or ostracized by their own culture and being overcome with anger.

I personally have not had a problem with anyone trying to “radicalize” me. It does happen enough though that it should be a concern. It will be best for you to keep your head on your shoulders and not get caught up with extreme points of view. Know that all of the scholars overseas and in America have absolutely refuted terrorism in their fatawa (legal rulings). Extremism is on the very edges of the Islamic thought. Do your best to stay on a middle way.

12. Do not despair

“So know that victory is with patience, and relief is with distress and that with hardship comes ease.”
-The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ

Being a convert to Islam, you will face a lot of tribulations. There is not anything that you cannot overcome though, and never despair in Allah (swt).

Allah (swt) guided to you to Islam, you searched for the answer and you found it. Be happy and constantly remind yourself of the blessings in your life. There are a lot of good things that will happen to you and you are on the straight road to Jannah (paradise). Rejoice in being Muslim. Remember the Sahabah (companions) were all converts to Islam and they were human beings that came from Adam and Eve just like you! Be strong and find comfort in your prayers and worship to Allah (swt). The first six months were the hardest for me, and insha’Allah we will all continue to grow as a convert community in America.

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234 Comments

  1. Raiiq Ridwan says:

    Alhamdulillah. Loved it very much :)

  2. Zaufishan says:

    Relevant, practical and realistic. These are the very issues converts deal with and need support,
    Jazakallah khairan.

  3. Darren says:

    Salaams,

    This advice really gets to the core of the challenges that new Muslims face. Thanks for taking the time to write this article. It was certainly a blessing for me to have read this.

  4. Usman says:

    Alhamdulillah really practical and useful post

  5. Julie says:

    I’m a new Muslim. About a month now. Thank you for these wonderful words they have made my heart happy for I was feeling like I was not doing or feeling what I should. I have never been so happy with my religion. I yearn for the learning.

    • Shabana Naushad says:

      May Allah’s peace and blessing be upon you.if you need any help in knowing Islam, feel free to contact me.

    • Sagal says:

      Sister Julie
      Inshallah things will be easy for you and for your family. Welcome to Islam.

      Salaam

  6. Josphine says:

    I am new in muslim. It is hard for me because if my family, relatives and family friends know about it, i will be isolated. It has been hard for me to perform prayers as i do it in secret. Am happy to read this as i now have hope. Thank you.

    • Dawn says:

      Sis, I pray that Allah will help to sooth your heart so you can find content happiness. Although things will be rough, you know who to come back to. Never lose hope, and know that I admire you very much for your courage! Seek knowledge and display the best of attitude. One day, insha’allah, your family will know how more beautiful you turned out to be, being in Islam. Love, from your Muslim sister :)

    • Sagal says:

      May Allah make things easy for you sister. I cant even imagine what you are going through. Find masjids close and reach out to sisters. Most of the time we dont pay attention as we should, so pls sis remind us and Inshallah we will be there for you.

    • MalikHabesha says:

      Salaam alaykum sister,

      I am a convert too and I understand what you are going through, be patient and calm about this, Allah will reward you for the struggles you are facing. I converted 3 years ago but I still pray in secret when I visit my family, just know you are not alone and thousands of converts out there are facing similar troubles. Be patient, make dua, keep your deen simple and read Qur’an to increase your eeman, even if you listen to it on mp3.

      Finally, read Surat Al-Asr(chapter 103 of the Qur’an, it will have good advice for you. Also Surat Luqman(31:13-19).

      May Allah help you.

  7. sherri weitnauer says:

    Thank you for this information. I am always looking for articles on this subject. I wish I knew where to find a “helper” who could assist me. I am still searching. However, my heart is content with my choice to convert. Subhana Allah.

    • Dawn says:

      I pray that you will find your way. Amin~ The best search is the search of knowledge, and the best struggle is the struggle within the heart. May Allah guide you every step of the way.

  8. Sarina says:

    “As a new Muslim, you will have trouble keeping up with prayers every day, fasting during Ramadan, and the many other practices in this religion.”

    This is not necessarily true and the writer cannot say for certain what the actions or troubles of a new Muslim may or may not be, Inshaallah! I converted the end of 2009 and had NO problem fasting during Ramadhan. I struggle to get up for Fajr at times but, Inshaallah, I will be able to some day.

    I just don’t think its fair that you tell new Muslims that they are going to have trouble with something when you don’t know and this could just set them up for failure, Inshaallah!

    Furthermore, if you must make a statement like this then you should include Inshaallah as only Allah knows what will happen. :)

  9. Salaam Alaikum,

    Jazak Allahu Khayran, I loved this very much and wish it had been around when I was a baby Muslim.

    May Allah shower you and your family with blessings.

  10. Fuseina says:

    Masha Allah, great advice. Much of it applies to Muslims who are not converts also :) A good read for all of us.

  11. NAS says:

    MashAllah this is absolutely awesome, I am not a convert, but an American Muslim, and I benefited immensely from this. May Allah reward you and post more articles like these if you can.

    I guess it’s some comfort to converts to know that American Muslims (i.e. Muslims born and raised in the USA) face the same obstacles as converts. We’re all in this together.

    May Allah grant us patience and keep us on the straight path.

  12. M says:

    Peace everyone,

    This article was written by my friend Alex. I had the privilage of meeting him not long after I moved out from my parents’ home (and also not long after he had become Muslim).

    Our friendship developed and broadened one another’s understandings and perspectives of our faith and life at large (including countless conversations regarding languages, cultures, psyochology, sociology and several other topics).

    In-sha’-allah-ta’ala, the points in this article will serve as an inspiration to converts to Islam, as well as the Muslim-born, and even Non-Muslims.

    May God’s Peace and Blessings be upon all who read this article and comment thread.

  13. joshim says:

    very good article, but i dnt quite undertstand why u wud include the point on extremism. it will be better to define this term before u advise converts to stay away from it. and no extremism is not terrorism.

  14. Brother Alex says:

    As-salamu ‘Álaykum

    Sarina: Your criticism is definitely invited! I did not mean to bring people down by the opening statement in order to set them up for failure.

    I rather intended to let people know, that if they do find themselves struggling, it’s normal. I think it would be inappropriate to say “inshaAllah” at the end of the statement – because I wouldn’t want to wish harm upon anyone.

    I wanted to paint a realistic picture for the vast majority of converts who will have significant struggles with various aspects of their lives. It’s wonderful that you had an easy fast during your Ramadan :) may Allah accept!

    JazakAllah Khayr

    NAS: Good to know you got some benefit from this! Most of my friends who read it were not converts and still enjoyed it. I’m really glad that people are seeing the article as a motivational piece regardless of their status as a convert or a born-Muslim.

    JazakAllah Khayr

    -Br. Alex

  15. Amanda says:

    Assalamu Alaykum,
    JazakAllah Khair for this insight!
    I reverted in November 2007 and even though I was living with my (Muslim) husband and in-laws I did find it hard at the start.
    Alhamdulillah, Allah SWT continues to shower His Blessings on me opening my heart everyday to how beautiful Islam really is. InshaAllah I never stop learning!
    May Allah SWT bless and guide you, your family and the entire Ummah and keep us on the Straight Path to Jannatul Firdaus. Allahummah Ameen :)

  16. Noah says:

    Thank you. It is strong tips for even people who found their way back to Islam.

  17. RichuRiyas says:

    Masha Allah God Bless U….Always

  18. hajar fathima says:

    Assalamu Alaikkum

    I m reverted to Muslim before my marriage took place and I always loved this religion even when I had 9yrs of relationship with my husband…He never forced me to do any of rules that to be followed by Muslims but of my own interest I am now able to read the Quran fluently n Inshallah on my compeltion we did perform the Haj pilgrimage two yrs back and I am always thankful to my husband to make me embrace a very good religion(Islam) n now I fullfil all my duties as a Muslim woman. Allah has guided me to the right path…Ameen

  19. Nafisa says:

    Salaams to all
    Mashallah – perhaps with a few changes as suggested by other readers, this can be more widely distributed e.g. through FaceBook etc.
    Jazakallah for taking the time to articulate the journey and was very beneficial reminder for me (born Muslim) as we all need to remember the core purpose of our lives here on Earth.
    Nafisa Beg

  20. Amy says:

    Assalaamu alaykum

    Great post, Br. Alex. Jazakallahu khayran. I had some thoughts which I published on my own blog: http://ibnatalhidayah.blogspot.com/2011/03/tips-for-converts.html

  21. Nada says:

    salam Alikum

    I really enjoyed your artical jazak allah kheer..I was born saudi muslima alhamdulilah but it’s always helpful to see things from a different angle..sure it takes patience for a revert to change his life style and keep up with the Islamic practices but if you just keep Jannat alna’eem (the highest of all) that reverts are promised to in mind, that should keep you going. sure that makes me wish I was a revert :)

    I hope to see more reverts save up some cash and visit Makkah to perform Hajj or at least Omrah..that will strengthen your iman even more inshallah.

    bel tawfeeq inshallah sisters and brothers.

  22. christine says:

    wow!I am relieved to see this.I had become a muslim long ago and left because I was being radicalized by a mosque that my ex husband went to.He was very abusive and extreme.I am happy to know this is not the case.These people chased me away from islam.I am now trying to study islam and learn different views

    • Gibran says:

      Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

      Try listening to Nouman Ali Khan lectures. You get the real iman rush and Islamic knowledge.

  23. Alhamdulillah.
    I found this.

  24. Irshaad says:

    As salaamu Alaikum

    Gr8 article. I am from South Africa and have noted many people who came into the fold of Islam and who face challenges. If I may advise that the term should be reverted and not converted as it is an Islamic belief that we are born muslims and than the other religions are thrust upon us.

    May Allah grant all of you sabr (patience) and make your roads safe.Ameen

  25. Jeremiah says:

    JazakAllahu khairan brother. I just wanted to comment on the names of the brothers and sisters commenting. MashAllah, it is really beautiful to see names like Darren, Amanda, Alex, Sherri (and even Jeremiah alhumdulillah) are now being added to the list of ‘Muslim Names’.

  26. Anthony says:

    Good post bro and well written masha’Allah. It was refreshing to read some insights from a fellow convert. Not to put anyone down, but sometimes I feel as if born-Muslims don’t quite grasp the gravity of our trials.

    I became Muslim back in 2005 during college, and even there, I struggled with each of these to varying degrees. I had a REALLY tough time dealing with issues of isolation and the despair it can sire. Our community is often plagued with support issues whereby converts sometimes don’t get the attention or help they deserve. It’s sad, but it is a reality nonetheless.

    Insha’Allah, things will get better with time as people become more open and more understanding of others. It’s a hope I have, but I’m not holding my breath. Hope springs eternal but not when reality consumes it daily.

    Salaam/Peace

  27. Tricia says:

    Subhanallah

    Loved it, wish I had this when I converted(reverted).

  28. abu Abdullah says:

    I love the honesty of reverts practice, mash Allah. may Allah give all of you special mercy and istiqamah.
    Jazak Allah khayr for the article.

  29. Richie says:

    I recently sent Imam Webb an email and in this writing he has effected me yet again. Maybe i need to strive harder and eventually things will come to me.
    “The person who receives the greatest reward for the Salah is one who lives the farthest and has the farthest to walk.”-This particular passage spoke DIRECTLY to me as the nearest Mosque is about 60 miles away.
    I admit that it’s frightening to go somewhere where no one knows you and eveyone is different then you and try to be comfortable.This is something I need to get over.

    • Maryam says:

      I know your pain and I was born Muslim subhan Allah! Keep strong, Allah will open the best of ways inshaAllah.

  30. Richie says:

    My apologies. thank you Brother Alex

  31. moridiyyah says:

    love this,encouraging

  32. Jonathan says:

    As Salaam Alaikum,
    Great article! As relatively new muslim initially I struggled with the understanding of opinions regarding salah,times of prayer and other issues regarding the deen. It wasn’t until I started to study a madhab when things became clearer. How to correct your salah, if there is a mistake , preforming the travelers prayer, or what are the rights of the husband and wife in marriage, divorce, performing wudu and what breaks the wudu etc. which are very important issues many don’t know or understand. I would highly recommend finding a teacher that studies fiqh to avoid confusion and assist in your growth also to prevent getting involved in misguided movements . Reading hadith is fine but for understanding the depths of the rulings is another ballgame because of the abrogation that exist in ahadith, for a layperson it’s not recommended, so be aware.

  33. Peter says:

    Salaam brother Alex,

    Jazak Allah Khayran for the post! You have highlighted the most important challenges faced by the new muslims and provide simple and practical advices as a starting point. I also like it very much that you provide the quotes from the Qur’an and hadith for each of your tips. MashaAllah! I’d wish I have been given this guidance two years ago when I took shahada.

    I find that, in general, a lot of effort is spent on dawah by the community but I am not sure if enough effort is spent on supporting new muslims. I feel that the support structure and guidance for new muslims could be improved. I understand that it is sometimes difficult for born muslims to appreciate the challenges faced by new muslims as they did not go through this journey.

    I wonder if it would be possible for Imam Suhaib to dedicate an area within this site for guidance for new muslims. I am sure that many new muslims would like to contribute to this.

    Wa salaam

    • WebbStaff says:

      Asalamu `alaykum,

      If anyone would like to send articles for New Muslims, please submit them to submissions[at]suhaibwebb[dot]com.

      jazakumAllahu khayran!

  34. Agus Nizami says:

    Could I copy paste these wonderfull tips on my blog?
    Thank you very much..

  35. dpeat says:

    Good job. This should be like mandatory reading for all new converts.

  36. N. says:

    One of the things I find heartening about this article is the notion of converts/reverts reaching out and helping other converts/reverts.

    Since converting in the 90s, alhamdulillah, it has been an amazing, tough, humbling, gratifying journey — but one, as many know, that can be punctuated by intense loneliness. A lot of the loneliness stems from lack of connection, because of not finding many other converts along the way, or without many other converts connecting with me and vice versa.

    In my own life, there has definitely been a subtle pressure to ignore the experiences of converts. When I mention (or imply) to friends the particular pains of the convert journey, I am usually told that it is no different from the rupture that immigrants feel after they immigrate, or what non-practicing Muslims experience after practicing Islam again. My unique experience as a convert is essentially denied.

    I usually listen and take it in, and have rarely talked about it. But I think the denial is based on a lack of experience. The conversion experience is different. I’ve immigrated to another country and culture before, and (before finally accepting my belief in Islam) I had the experience of becoming a a practicing Catholic again after having lapsed. Immigration and renewing the faith of my family were nothing compared to the experience of conversion to Islam.

    I think speaking like this sometimes makes other muslims feel that there is some claim to being special, or better, or my-pain-is-greater-than-yours. The conversation is shut down. And the lack of understanding has often led to greater feelings of isolation.

    But I’m finally coming to the conclusion that as converts we need to reach out, support, and nurture each other more. Relying on people – beloved brothers and sisters in Islam though they be – who do not know our experiences to help us navigate them, or to empathize and comfort us, will just lead to more and more frustration and self-alienation.

    So thank you for this article, and here’s to more connection and empathy and loving support.

    • María M says:

      As salamu alaykum, N

      I agree with you, I have felt before being alone in a spiritual sense, but the strong feeling of loneliness after conversion is something different, I´ve been an immigrant too, and that is not the feeling is more like dying to a life and being born to a new life. I couldn´t relate anymore to who I was, I was the same person outside, but inside I was different, I was reborn, and I couldn´t relate to the people that was around because I didn´t know how to do it, I didn´t know what to do or how to behave, or what to say and that brought a deep sense of being lost, what really gave me a sense of belonging to Islam was this site and I slowly began to feel I was not alone anymore, I learnt a lot following all the articles written here and I began to search deeper knowing that I was in the right track, Alhamdulillah.

  37. Ahmed says:

    Perhaps the scholars could provide a lecture series for reverts. I assume that there are plenty out there who took the shahadah and are wondering: “ok, what next “, “how do i go forward”, “what should i be doing now”. I personally have a revert friend and im having trouble in determining a correct way on what to do next.

  38. María M says:

    As salamu alaykum brother Alex,

    Thank you very much for your article, it will be a point of reference for me from now on, it really brings forward all the sensitive points we go through after conversion, acknowledges all our struggles.

    Jazak Allahu Khairan

  39. Sandeep pancharia says:

    Kindly convey imp things regarding Islam on above adress for sandeep pancharia as he is intrested to knw about islam.

  40. Jaliya Abdillahi says:

    Ma asha Allah its so nice,may Allah reward u for this work

  41. Sarah says:

    great tips, JazakumAllah khair for sharing

  42. Ramadan says:

    Salam to the author. It is useful to muslim converts in China. I am studying on them. Many confrontations should be expained to them as the teachings of Imams in China is a little bit conservative which give a lot ocstacle for now converts to understand and practise Islam.

  43. Alaa Suliman says:

    Converts ROCK!!!!

  44. douglas_kelly says:

    Five years into my Deen, this is still highly useful information. JazakAllahu khaira!

  45. Ramonda says:

    Alhamdulillah

    This is very good information!

    Jazaka Allahu Khair

  46. Myhijabpinhatesme says:

    Very helpful post! I am still in the midst of considering Islam. There are those that say that if I accept the 5 pillars of Islam, then I am a Muslim. I don’t feel I can openly declare myself a Muslim, that is “obedient” if I don’t know what all I am expected to be obedient to.

    I’ve only finished reading half the Qur’an, and I struggle with the concept of the Hadiths — they just strike me as did the writings in the Epistles in the Bible — folks jumping on the prophets’ shirt-tails, adding in things that weren’t in the original message that mostly serve to reaffirm very rigid styles that the prophets themselves did not seem to adhere to. I’m not sure I can be obedient to those, and am not sure, as a woman, that I want to have to defend my decisions to those who could make my life more difficult because of them.

    I wish Faith could just be Faith. Simple. Always, since I was a child, my search has been for a way to be part of the Greater Voice — what I was led to see as all the people praying together (regardless of religion) — but it is important for each person to find a religion that helps them each as individuals achieve a strong, ongoing relationship with God/Allah (swt). As much as I dislike organized religion, I have been blessed to have been made to see with understanding that purpose and so I struggle to try to connect and stay connected.

    I just don’t know that I am ready to wear a hijab
    and make a public statement of my faith. Still, there is so much awkwardness — like in the grocery store, when I see women in hijab who might be from the Mosque I go to, and there is me in a T-shirt, passing by, and I say, “Salam Alikom” and they look at me like I am from a different planet. So without hijab, without proper dress, I cannot really acknowledge or be acknowledged among Muslims — but if I wear the hijab and cover my arms on the hottest/stickiest of days, I will be seen as alien by everyone else.

    For now, I carry my hijab scarf with me and cover my head for prayers (in secret), and then live my life in the secular world in the secular way, with the exception that I try to make more modest choices in clothing.

    (Have you tried to do this with women’s summer clothing in K-Mart, Dress Barn, Target or Marshall’s stores? Really not possible! All the sleeves are short or mid-length, all the necks reveal cleavage, and the only ankle-length skirts are size 3X.)

    The exception would be the gym. I need to see curves at the gym because right now I have ripples (and not the good kind). Tight-fitting clothing is for me to see my progress and to make sure I am using good form, not for the jocks.

    But there is also some truth to the idea that if a woman doesn’t dress like she is interested in being attractive to men in America, she will not be attracting any men.

    I’m 44 and single. My previous job used to keep me on the road all the time, so now that I am more stationary, I would like to meet men. But at the Mosque, all the men are somewhere on the other side of a wall. I’ve been told that the proper way to meet a good man is to put one’s number up at the Mosque with the note, “Looking to marry” and they will call. That just feels creepy. I’ve done that sort of thing with Match.com and the process is deflating. Matches are hard to make. Like I’m going to want to risk the possibility of having to reject or be rejected by half the guys from the place I am trying to pray in?

    This is way too long of a response, but considering Islam leaves one a lot to consider. Thank you for your post, it helps.

  47. Jenna says:

    Alhamdulilah, thank you for this article. Thank you for portraying very organic issues for Muslim converts, especially in the West. I feel extremely lonely in my conversion process. When I speak to Muslims I know (these are people who were born Muslim) about some of the issues I struggle with since my conversion, they skirt over the issues and diminish them. I feel like no one truly listens, but alhamdulilah, I know Allah listens. It is truly refreshing to see that others struggle with issues that I also struggle with. I am definitely lonely, but my lonliness is by no means a choice. I do not know any other Muslim converts, so I have no one to network with in regards to my process. I struggle with telling people I have converted, and for this reason, and this reason alone, I have not put on hijab, but have such a yearning to do so. I don’t want other Muslims to criticize me and my struggles. I want people to see my humanity and I just want someone who has gone through this experience to listen to me. So, alhamdulilah, thank you for this article, as it was truly therapeutic. Such a blessing.

    • Mrs. Said Bouaziza says:

      Only a handful of people know about me, my husband Said being one and Said is Muslim, Alhamdulillah.

      My family already insult me, because of my love for Said. I have been hit and called Muslim dog. They don’t know about my conversion. They say I have been brainwashed. They think he has influenced me (Well he did have some input)and they think I havent a mind of my own. They call him a terrorist and say I am bringing one into the country. They tell me I look like an idiot and they poke fun of his heritage. He is Moroccan. They poke fun at the djebella (What I have is a version of it)however these insults are done by the boy who thinks he is a man and by his definition I am a dog. This boy is my younger brother and is a true testament to hypocrisy, not believing in GOD and suddenly claiming a belief. He is also the one who hit me. He thinks, by his words I am hurt and he holds that power. I called the police when he hit me again, as he thought he had the right to.

      My husband is not here at the moment, but my husband, younger than my brother and me, would have killed him had he seen the way my brother came into my room to hit me. Said is Muslim and knows that hitting a woman is not the right thing to do.

      • Saba says:

        Sisters Jenna,Mrs.Said..
        Its true..lots of born muslims cant even imagine what converts have to face each day,esp in the West.A handful of ppl haved defamed Islam n portrayed it to be what it is not.Islam has always talked about moderation in every aspect of life,to stay within the limits defined in it.
        Jenna,the reason,i feel ,many born muslims behave the way they do is because they may not feel apt enough to answer your questions,and may fear saying something wrong..I,being a born muslim would feel the same way if a deep rooted question regarding islam was put to me..i would need to have to learn more before i guided somebody else..though,simple ques.,i can answer..:) Try talking to someone who has more knowledge like a lady imam..You’re right,there should be a platformm where born n convert muslims discuss issues..I dont always use the hijab too,its not Farz,i use it when going to a market,whats required is a woman not wear tight clothing,avoiding anything that would attract unnecessary attention..
        Mrs. Said,
        May Allah guide your brother to the straight path..u have been through a lot..The media is to blame for the image thats been portrayed about Islam exaggerating about the handful of ppl who are no where near Islam.
        May Allah reward you all for your struggles.
        Ameen.

  48. nursarah says:

    Assalamualaikum to all.
    Alhamdulillah. Thank you, Brother Alex for this enlightening article. What you’ve shared is just so realistic, eventhough we live millions of miles apart.
    May Allah bless you for helping us your fellow Muslims

  49. Peace says:

    It’s very informative MA. Just re the point of loneliness I am not a convert but I find myself lonely because as Muslims we are so diverse and come from differing backgrounds and so to find your true soulmate friend is quite hard. Especially that the people you used enjoy company with are not religious and so will find your new religion quite hard to come to terms with. My advice would be to always try to find people who share your level of education, spirituality and intellect as well as your new religion ofcourse( it’s quite hard!!) but pray hard and Allah will guide you to them IA.

  50. svend says:

    Wonderful advice.

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