“The brothers are intimidated by you,” she told me. SubhanAllah. This is not the first time I’ve heard that. “Why?” I inquired. She explained, “He [the unnamed, anonymous brother-commentator] said that brothers are intimidated by sisters in leadership positions.”
This is the second year I am the president of our campus Muslim Student Association. Why am I the president? And why for two years in a row?
Let’s check off the reasons:
- My great love of fame [auothobillah]: not quite.
- My passionate desire to lead: guess again.
- No brothers to step up to the plate: you got it!
Brothers are intimidated by me because I am in a position where no brothers would step up to take on?
Another sister tried to comfort me in this plight of brothers not stepping it up, and yet being intimidated by sisters who are put in the position to fully take on trying to carry the Deen of Allah ‘Azza wa Jal on an organizational level.
She told me, “SubhanAllah… we need to change… the brothers to be exact… if they can’t handle you… then imagine them, they couldn’t handle Aisha radiAllahu anha and Khadija radiAllahu anha AT ALL!”
Obviously there is no comparison to this pathetic sinner and the great and noble Ummahatul Mu’mineen, radi Allahu anhuma, but I think her point is clear:
Step up brothers! Our ummah is lacking MEN.
We live in a society which perpetuates boyhood. Just look at the hype over the new release of GTA! Are you seriously playing that game as a young male adult? As a teenage brother who is the future of this ummah?? Are you kidding me?
Our men [and women- why is dressing like Katie Bell so much more beautiful to our sisters than dressing like Fatima radi Allahu anha? We seek Allah’s help and refuge! And we’ll save that topic for later insha’Allah…] are being pumped with the glamorization of pornography, violence and theft, and it’s creating a cycle of boyhood which is leaving sisters who are ready to move forward and ready to take on contributing back to society, as single souls waiting for just ONE brother who show up who is actually a MAN.
What can you, dear brother reader, do about it?
1- Seek Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, and strive to reform yourself. Seriously work to build a relationship with the Qur’an and read it in a language you understand on a daily basis. Can’t you spare only 15 minutes of your day for the Qur’an? Bi’idnillah, let us stop making excuses and start reaping ajr, begin cultivating tazkiyya, and engage consistently in tarbiyya through knowing the Qur’an!
2- Increase your thikr in the morning and in the late afternoon- after ‘asr- (see www.makedua.com for duaas the Prophet sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallama would make during those times). Take advantage of what the ultimate man, Rasul Allah, sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, did on a daily basis to be like him, sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam.
For those who aren’t taking advantage of this yet, just take a look at only two benefits of only two duaas (and there are a ton more subhanAllah!):
حَسْبِيَ اللهُ لَآ إِلَهَ إِلَّا هُوَ عَلَيْهِ تَوَكَّلْتُ وَهُوَ رَبُّ الْعَرْشِ الْعَظِيمِ
Hasbiyallaahu laa ‘ilaaha ‘illaa Huwa ‘alayhi tawakkaltu wa Huwa Rabbul-’Arshil-’Adheem
Allah is sufficient for me. There is none worthy of worship but Him. I have placed my trust in Him, He is Lord of the Majestic Throne. (Recite seven times in Arabic.)
Allah will grant whoever recites this seven times in the morning or evening whatever he desires from this world or the next.
[Ibn As-Sunni, Abu Dawud]
رَضِيتُ باللهِ رَبَّاً، وَبِالْإِسْلَامِ دِيناً، وَبِمُحَمَّدٍ صَلَى اللهُ عَلِيهِ وَسَلَّمَ نَبِيَّا
Radheetu billaahi Rabban, wa bil-’Islaami deenan, wa bi-Muhammadin (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallama) Nabiyyan.
I am pleased with Allah as my Lord, with Islam as my religion and with Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) as my Prophet.
(Recite three times in Arabic)
“Allah has promised that anyone who says this three times every morning or evening will be pleased on the Day of Resurrection.” [Ahmed]
4- and take the responsibility of leading this ummah seriously.
There is a reason Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has described you as “…quwamona ‘alan Nisaa” (an Nisaa: 34). And notice: the verse did not say that BOYS are quwamona ‘alan Nisaa. The verse says, “AR RIJAAL…”- MEN.
Learn about what that means and act upon it. Here’s a great resource for you: www.qtafsir.com.
But you know what an even greater resource is? The Qur’an itself! So make it your close companion, and may Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala elevate you and make you a modern day Usamah ibn Zayd, Sa’ad ibn Abi Waqqas, Mus’aab ibn Umayr and Muadh ibn Jabal radi Allahu anhum…these companions who took on this message as YOUTH, but carried it as strong men.
Bismillah- go for it!
Obviously the above advice does not pertain specifically to our brothers, but I felt that it would be more beneficial to include some naseeha instead of going off on a rant against brothers and leaving them hanging. And what would inshaAllah benefit me greatly is to hear advice from all of you as to how we can improve our state as an ummah, and how we can go back to following the blessed examples of those men and women who were molded through the greatest teacher, Rasul Allah, sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallam.
I ask Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala to make all of us a means of benefiting our societies, a means of carrying the responsibility of this heavy message with wisdom and sincerity, and a means of being a blessing wherever we are.
Please forgive me, and alHamdullilah- by Allah’s Mercy- this isn’t a perpetual plague. We’ll be having a brother as our MSA president this upcoming year, inshaAllah.
Wa Allahu ‘alam