Archive for the ‘Marriage & Family’ category
Age Difference Between Spouses
Question: My question is in regard to age difference in marriage and understanding how realistic it is in the North American context. I am 28 years old and there is a particular brother I am interested in who has incredible character and whom I feel I really click with. The issue is that he is [...]
Want Your Marriage to Last? Get Premarital Counseling
I spent my time at a recent wedding listening to people’s marriage problems. As the guests danced the night away in celebration, I sat in the back of the hall talking about shattered dreams and unfulfilled expectations. Sometimes, we had to scream to hear each other over the music. There was the young woman whose [...]
My Wife is Always Angry
Question: My wife and I are newly married, and I feel she is always angry with me. During the planning of the wedding, I thought her moodiness was due to the stress of the wedding. However, her frustration has continued into our marriage. The smallest of things that I say or do, which in my [...]
Love the Libas (Clothing)
By Sabeen Mansoori The beauty of this perfect deen (way of life) that Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) has blessed us with is in its details. There is an intricate system of protection for the personal space of the believing man and the believing woman. There are additional safeguards built into an Islamic [...]
A Reflection on Aging Parents
Like most children, I thought my parents were superheroes. My mom could open the tightest of jars and could carry us around while she finished her chores. My dad could come back from a long business trip and still have the strength to play and take care of all 6 of us. I was in [...]
The Cancer Patient
By Robin Imran Mahmud I am currently interning at a hospital in my community. My role is to help the nurses look after their patients’ needs. My tasks include changing beds, feeding patients, discharging patients, and helping nurses clean the bodies of patients who are in the last stages of their lives. One day as I was checking on patients [...]
I Can’t Get in the Mood with my Husband
Question: I have a serious problem and was hoping you could offer some advice. I have been married for three months, meaning we just had the wedding and moved in together three months ago. Prior to that, I had my nikkah (religious marriage ceremony) for one year. The marriage was not consummated then, and we [...]
Distance in Marriage
Question: I have been married for 15 years and now have 2 children. Generally my marriage has been good. My husband and I are both practicing Muslims and we are raising our children with Islam. My husband is helpful with our children, dropping them off at school, helping with homework, and I take care of [...]
My Husband Has Not Consummated Our Marriage
Question: My husband and I have been married for two and a half years now, but we have not yet consummated our marriage. He does not have a physical problem. He tells me the reason is because of school and family pressure, but I just don’t know if that’s true. This issue has taken a [...]
Making Rain
by Shahraiz Tabassam As I walked out onto the porch, I found Rizma strolling in the front lawn, surveying the plants that surrounded her. She looked on, and I could tell that she had already been doing this for some time now and, by the looks of it, was clearly bored. It was the start [...]
Reality Check: Domestic Violence and Muslim Families
Salma Abugideiri is a licensed professional counselor who specializes in trauma and couples therapy. She is also the co-director of the Peaceful Families Project, an organization devoted to ending domestic violence in Muslim families. Salma develops and conducts awareness workshops about domestic violence for Muslim leaders and communities, and trainings for people who work with [...]
Single Parenting
Parenting is a tough job, but single parenting is an even tougher challenge, as one parent tries to fulfill the roles of both a mother and a father to their child. Single parenting is highly demanding physically, emotionally and financially. There can be numerous reasons and circumstances for single parenting, such as divorce, a spouse [...]
Two way Streets
By Ahmed Zaafran A short while ago, my wife and I took our two kids to the local public library. Going to the library today is much different than it was when I was a child. I remember the distinct smell of old books and how their pages seemed to coalesce into a never-ending narrative. [...]
Wifehood and Motherhood are Not the Only Ways to Paradise
“Why are you majoring in that field?” I asked a sister in college. She sighed, “To be honest, I just want to get married. I don’t really care about what I’m studying right now. I’m just waiting to get hitched so I can be a wife and a mother.” “It’s awesome that she wants to [...]
Thoughts on Parenting
by AbdelRahman Mussa This article is a culmination of some of my thoughts about parenting, prompted by recent conversations. It is intended for both parents and grown adults. If you’re not a parent, you might find that some of what you will read gives you insight—insight that will allow you to change your perceptions of [...]
How to Talk to Our Children about 9/11
Do you know what happened on 9/11? Muslims who were coming of age ten years ago are well aware and have inevitably learned of the events of 9/11 and how to cope with the ramifications of that fateful day. Yet, the children who were barely infants in our tender arms on 9/11 have entered this [...]
Nurturing Spirituality in Children During Ramadan
Ramadan is a special time of the year when Muslim parents, especially in the West, want children to feel excited about its arrival. It is common in Muslim homes to find a festive environment that demonstrates just what a celebratory month it is. Welcoming Ramadan with sparkly decorations in our homes and the anticipation of [...]
Question on Intercourse
Question: I have a very sensitive question. I would like to know if oral sex is permitted or whetherit is haram (impermissible) in Islam. Could you tell me what the ruling is? Answer: No problem; “Allah is not shy of the truth” (Bukhari). Oral sex is permissible between husband and wife as long as neither [...]
Abused Men
The idea that a man could be abused seems unimaginable to many. Yet it is a reality. Abuse of men is socially minimized because people do not know enough about the cycle of abuse. But domestic violence against men, and abusive relationships of all types, occurs across all ethnic, racial, religious and socio-economic levels. The [...]
Hurting Homes
Abuse is a topic that many Muslims shy away from because it is uncomfortable to tackle an issue that is complex and appears unsolvable. Many times when I address the topic of marriage, I clarify that the strategies I suggest do not apply to abusive relationships. Yet, what I have learned is that people who [...]






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